Sorry folks, there are no jokes today. Just want to share a few details of my personal hell with you all. Maybe you don't want to hear it, but I need somewhere to say it, and here it all is.
First I am very sick. I have been since last week and my last post. It is a week later and I am still doing fairly bad. I have a lot of pressure in my chest, my ribs hurt form couching and nothing ever coming up. It seem likely I need doctor, but I have no insurance and less money. So lets hope some vitamin C is enough to get me back on a healthy path. If it doesn't, then I guess I might just learn that last punchline.
Second my brother's wife just had their first child. It is a little girl. Knowing the two of them, the best name the child could have is "future abuse victim". Seems criminal that a pair like them can have a child with no one doing anything to stop them. Well too late now, in 16-18 year the child will be a problem for the state. Sometimes an abortion would be a better solution for all parties involved.
Thirdly, and lastly, I think I have lost my woman. No point in details here. How can I explain something I don't fully understand? She might be gone, but I still love her. Might not matter to her if I love her, but I do and always will.
Well that is all my sad bullshit. Sorry for the lack of humor. Next week, and next year we will laugh together again. Happy New year, Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays. On New Years, have a drink for me.
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Gameboy Micro Review
Well I am really sick right now. So lets keep this short.
This is a review of the Game Boy Micro I did. It is a little system that came and went fairly fast. While a quality system and good at what it did, it wasn't what the public wanted at the time.
I would like to movie on from photo-montage videos, but sadly I don't have a camera that can do any good video work. Hope you liked the review. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and what ever the hell you want to hear this time of year.
This is a review of the Game Boy Micro I did. It is a little system that came and went fairly fast. While a quality system and good at what it did, it wasn't what the public wanted at the time.
I would like to movie on from photo-montage videos, but sadly I don't have a camera that can do any good video work. Hope you liked the review. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and what ever the hell you want to hear this time of year.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
The "War" on Christmas
Some people claim there exist a war on Christmas. This is untrue. If a war on Christmas was ever waged, clearly Christmas won and then enslaved the survivors of the losing side. So clearly it is time for someone to try to take down Christmas. So lets ask some uncomfortable questions about this holiday.
There are those who claim we need more "Christ" in Christmas. Alright, if you feel that way. However, first I am going to ask you to prove that this "Christ" character ever actually existed. Sure, some various churches claim to have proof, but they have a certain interest in keeping people believing in "Christ", more than a bit of a conflict of interest. A body of this man would be great proof, but sadly if we find one, that will lead to the death of Christmas. So, Christians, the ball is in your court on this one. If you want more "Christ", just prove he was real, and not a collective driven imaginary friend.
Some people say Christmas is too commercial. They might have a point. Then again, the economy is rather bad at the moment. If Christmas is so commercial, would the economy be this bad? Seems like a overly commercial event would do a lot to help the economy, yet Christmas doesn't seem to be helping all that much. So lets spend more money, and spend less time with asshole we hate (family).
There is a separation of church and state in my country. So they say. However, Christmas is a national holiday. This is a supposedly christian holiday it is "CHRIST-mas' after all. So how much separation between church and state is there, when a clearly christian holiday is a national public holiday?
There is no war on Christmas, but there should be. So lets start one. Lets make it as forgotten as all of the various "saint" days.
There are those who claim we need more "Christ" in Christmas. Alright, if you feel that way. However, first I am going to ask you to prove that this "Christ" character ever actually existed. Sure, some various churches claim to have proof, but they have a certain interest in keeping people believing in "Christ", more than a bit of a conflict of interest. A body of this man would be great proof, but sadly if we find one, that will lead to the death of Christmas. So, Christians, the ball is in your court on this one. If you want more "Christ", just prove he was real, and not a collective driven imaginary friend.
Some people say Christmas is too commercial. They might have a point. Then again, the economy is rather bad at the moment. If Christmas is so commercial, would the economy be this bad? Seems like a overly commercial event would do a lot to help the economy, yet Christmas doesn't seem to be helping all that much. So lets spend more money, and spend less time with asshole we hate (family).
There is a separation of church and state in my country. So they say. However, Christmas is a national holiday. This is a supposedly christian holiday it is "CHRIST-mas' after all. So how much separation between church and state is there, when a clearly christian holiday is a national public holiday?
There is no war on Christmas, but there should be. So lets start one. Lets make it as forgotten as all of the various "saint" days.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
The Real 12 Days of Christmas
Yes, as it that time of year, we need at least one new song parody. Hope you enjoy it.
On the first day of Christmas
my family made me:
Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the second day of Christmas
my family made me:
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the third day of Christmas
my family made me:
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the fourth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the fifth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the sixth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the seventh day of Christmas
my family made me:
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and a Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the eighth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and a Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the ninth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the tenth day of Christmas
my family made me:
See ten people I hate
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the eleventh day of Christmas
my family made me:
Go to eleven malls
See ten people I hate
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the first day of Christmas
my family made me:
Twelve unwanted art and crafts
Go to eleven malls
See ten people I hate
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the first day of Christmas
my family made me:
Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the second day of Christmas
my family made me:
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the third day of Christmas
my family made me:
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the fourth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the fifth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the sixth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the seventh day of Christmas
my family made me:
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and a Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the eighth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and a Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the ninth day of Christmas
my family made me:
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the tenth day of Christmas
my family made me:
See ten people I hate
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the eleventh day of Christmas
my family made me:
Go to eleven malls
See ten people I hate
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
On the first day of Christmas
my family made me:
Twelve unwanted art and crafts
Go to eleven malls
See ten people I hate
Nine shitty fruitcakes
Bang eight fetish hookers
Beat-up seven Santas
Stand in six return lines
Drink a fifth of vodka
Eat four pounds of ham
Trample three unlucky shoppers
Consider Suicide twice
and Crash drunkenly into a tree
Sunday, December 2, 2012
Obvious Things People Don't Seem to Understand.
Lot of stupid people out there. So here is a message to all of them.
1. That big box will not fit in your car. No, I don't care how you have bullshitted yourself. Get your hands on a truck or SUV. If you have no friends with a bigger vehicle, then you don't get to buy the big TV.
2. Andrew W.K. has only one song he keeps making. "Beat beat beat name of the song".
3. Not shopping at somewhere does not make you a better person.
4. Going out of your way to shop somewhere doesn't make you a better person.
5. Your children are ugly and annoying. Also, you should of had an abortion. Your mother should have too.
6. In-N-Out Burger sucks now. What the fuck happened to the meat? It has gotten so damn small.
7. It doesn't matter who the president is. Never has, never will.
8. Alcohol is the best energy drink.
1. That big box will not fit in your car. No, I don't care how you have bullshitted yourself. Get your hands on a truck or SUV. If you have no friends with a bigger vehicle, then you don't get to buy the big TV.
2. Andrew W.K. has only one song he keeps making. "Beat beat beat name of the song".
3. Not shopping at somewhere does not make you a better person.
4. Going out of your way to shop somewhere doesn't make you a better person.
5. Your children are ugly and annoying. Also, you should of had an abortion. Your mother should have too.
6. In-N-Out Burger sucks now. What the fuck happened to the meat? It has gotten so damn small.
7. It doesn't matter who the president is. Never has, never will.
8. Alcohol is the best energy drink.
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