Ideas Vol. 7 Laws Edition

Here in the USA we live in a land of laws. There exist laws and ordinances for virtually every facet of life. However, it seem that some of these legal concepts are a bit one sided, and should be balanced just a little better.  Here are just a few ideas along this line of thought.

1. Drunk Driving.

Not everyone reacts to alcohol the same way. Yet, everyone is held to the standard of ".08". So, how about a test to determine what the limit for each individual would be. Lightweights might be unsafe to drive after only one beer; whereas some people might be alright to drive after chugging a 5th. Then on each person's license it would have a mark to denote where the limit was for that individual. This wouldn't be permanent, as the drunk testing would be done each time the license came up for renewal.

2. Taxing Churches.

Every business and individual pays taxes. That is all but one, the business of selling faith pays no tax. It is time they anted up. Churches take in billions of dollars, and it is all tax free. This should stop. Not just for the revenue it would generate, but also because churches hold sway over how their members will vote. If churches want a say in politics, then they should pay just like everyone else.

A piggy bank long overdue to be emptied.

3. Having children.

In some parts of the US in order to have an abortion, a woman must watch an abortion being preformed. While the merits of this are highly debatable, it is the way it is some places. That being said, turn about about is fair play. So in order to go ahead and give birth a mother should have to sit in a restaurant and eat a meal surrounded by screaming, crying, and hyper children. This would lead to a lot less children being birthed. Why should we act like giving birth is any better than terminating a birth? Both are fine options, and should be treated equally.

Obvious Things People Don't Seem to Understand.

Lot of stupid people out there. So here is a message to all of them.

1. That big box will not fit in your car. No, I don't care how you have bullshitted yourself. Get your hands on a truck or SUV. If you have no friends with a bigger vehicle, then you don't get to buy the big TV.

2. Andrew W.K. has only one song he keeps making. "Beat beat beat name of the song".

3. Not shopping at somewhere does not make you a better person.

4. Going out of your way to shop somewhere doesn't make you a better person.

5. Your children are ugly and annoying. Also, you should of had an abortion. Your mother should have too.

6. In-N-Out Burger sucks now. What the fuck happened to the meat? It has gotten so damn small.

7. It doesn't matter who the president is. Never has, never will.

8. Alcohol is the best energy drink.

Inappropriate Gifts.

Sometimes you need to make a point. At times the best way to make a point can be with a gift. So lets see.

Have to go to a baby shower? Why not give the expecting mother something she will never forget. A single wire hanger...

Know someone going through a bad break up? There is only one gift to get them. The gift that works like magic to kill pain be it physical, psychological, or emotional. Alcohol.

What if you knew someone down on their luck? Someone without hope. The kind of person that is about to, or already has, given up. There is one thing you can get them that will do far more harm than good...

Dealing with Hangovers.

We all know St Patrick's day is coming. It is a fun day that you will just barely remember if done right. The down side to the holiday is the morning (or afternoon) the next day. That hangover that hits some harder than others. It is alright, there are ways to deal with a hangover.

Waking up hungover is a horrid experience, but there are very easy steps to deal with it. First, have drink, not a big one, a good shot or a mixed drink depending how much work you want to do. Having more alcohol will get rid of some of the symptoms, but they will return if you don't follow the next step. Now that you have had a little more booze, drink lots of water or better still Gatorade (any non-caffeinated sports drink will do). The hangover is caused mostly by dehydration, so the water or sports drink will hydrate you. Sports drinks are better for a number reasons, one they have some calories your body needs, secondly they give your body back some of salts and other nutrients that likely left your body in some way the night before. Now that you are hydrated have a nice meal with some good protein and you should be ready to face whatever the day has in store for you. That is all you have to do. Vodka is a good choice that first step, and eggs work well for the meal. Keep in mind, too much more alcohol will make things worse.

Now some people would rather avoid the hangover altogether. If you are planning to drink heavily avoiding a hangover is almost impossible. Some are lucky and have the genetics to not be troubled by hangovers, this doesn't help the remainder of the population. You could not drink; but whats the fun in that? You can lessen the effects of hangover by avoiding mixing alcohol and caffeine, and by mixing your booze with fruit juice. The fruit juice method can have its own problems as too much sugar can lead to hangover like effects.

Hope you all have a good time on St Patrick's day. Luckily it is on a Saturday this year, so the hangover won't be as big of a problem. This advice should serve you well for years to come.