Thursday, December 26, 2013

Last post this year.

Well this is the end of the third year of this blog. It is great that there are readers that come here every week. Lets not end the year on a negative note. Instead, lets be a little positive.

Long term readers of this blog will know that we are not generally kind to Christmas here, so lets talk about the good parts of the holiday season. In fact lets have a top ten of good things about this time of year.

10. My mothers banana bread. I know only I get to enjoy, but still I love it.

9. Seeing the smiles of friends as they open gifts.

8. Giving a little cash to charity.

7. Reconnection with those you are estranged from.

6. Steam sale.

5. Cheap candy the day after Christmas.

4. Shopping violence.

3. Suicide rates go up. Always gives me hopes that one of my enemies will end it all.

2. Hearing the wistful stories of holiday drunks.

1. Being incredibly grateful to not be working retail this holiday season.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Merry Christmas

Happy Holidays to all. I am out of town this week. Might have something for you latter this week, if there time. Sorry for the lack of content. You know how this time of year can get.

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Porno Parodies.

This is just a list of some hilarious porno parodies. These may or may not really exist.

10. Dark Soles. A foot fetish movie with black chicks.

9. World War Bukkake.

8. Big Wang Theory. Somehow the science is actually more actuate than on the show.

7. Gang-bang-ster Squad. These men are on a mission.

6. Bioshock Indecent. A porno that people will act like makes deep philosophical points.

5. Dildos. A computer animated film about the secret lives of sex toys. Featuring the voice work of John Ratzenberger.

4. Movie 69. Has a lot of stars in it doing things completely unrelated to one another.

3. Rear-Ender's game. All anal, all sci-fi. And he thinks it is a simulation.

2.  The Hung Games: Crotch on Fire. If only we could get the real actress from that.

1. Pacific Rim-Job.  Giant monster that like to have there asses eaten out.

Saturday, December 7, 2013

Making a frozen pizza better.

Good pizza is hard to find. Good pizza is also expensive. You can buy frozen pizza, but it is usually pretty bad. The good news is, you can make some frozen pizza fairly good, with a just a little effort.

First you need the right frozen pizza to act as a base. Thick crust varieties will never turn out very good. So you need a thin crust. Don't bother getting anything with toppings, you can add your own and they will taste far better than what generally comes on a frozen pizza.

Here is a great place to start.

Now you have the base, it is time to build upon it. First we need more cheese. Mozzarella is nice. A little jack cheese is good too. A good way to save money is to use "string cheese". Take 2-4 string cheeses, slice/grate/pull them apart, put on the frozen pizza. Just having a bit more cheese will greatly improve your pizza.

Now is where you can add some toppings. You can get good meat balls fairly cheap. Or you could use some ham. Really this is all a matter of what you like. Virtually any meat is good. Mushrooms are nice. Just keep in mind that you want to cut whatever you are going to use to be fairly thin.

The last thing to keep in mind is that adding things to the pizza will increase the baking time. If it says 18 minutes, it will be more like 20. However many factors effect cooking time, and your mileage will vary. This will also be quite a bit cheaper than ordering a high end pizza, and be better than any cheap pizza you can order.

Sunday, December 1, 2013

An item from the news.

There was a man that ended up divorced from his wife. The man lost the house to her. She now lives there with her new man. The newly divorced man bought the house right next to his former home. In the back yard he placed a statue. Here is a picture of that statue.

It is a solid bronze middle finger. It is only visible from the master bedroom of his old house. At night there is a spot light pointed at the statue.

This man in an inspiration to us all.