Help Save Some Giant Tits.

fhttp://www.gofundme.com/zk4za27f

Casey James the porn actress is apparently having some problems. Donate if you love big fake tits.

Been a fan of her for years, so I guess I thought I should try to help.

Signs you might be loser.

There are certain things a person might do, or think, or take part in, that more than likely means they are a loser. This is just a small list of such.

1. Going to a strip club on a weekday morning.

2. Is an adult without children that know a lot about children's television shows.

3. Anyone that has an opinion about day time television.

4. Has bought alcohol at 6am.

5. Has ever gotten drunk immediately after waking up.

6. Adult braces.

7. Gave a shit about the James Franco Roast. Or about anyone involved with that.

8. Is a regular player of the lottery.

9. Has a digital pornography collection larger than 100 gigs.

10. Keeps a weekly blog. Oh...

Controversial Opinions.

These are a few opinions I hold that seem to get people going. I don't see what the big deal is, I am not trying to force these views on anyone, but it would seem holding them is enough to get people after my blood. So lets explore them.

Pornography is art. Film and photography are both considered art. Why should film and photography of a particular subject be barred from being called "art"? When trying to define the difference between what was art and what was porn Justice Potter Stewart said "...I know when I see it...", this is bullshit, because this is no difference. Sexual content, or intent to sexually arouse you, does not limit the scoop of what art is.

It is more than somewhat likely Jesus didn't exist. While he might be a good role model, and might have a few good stories about him, there is not much in the way of proof that he was ever really here. The majority of sources that offer any proof are ones that exist within various churches, and these have a vested interest in keeping him real. We can prove many people far older than him were real, but he seems to be much more slippery. I guess it is time we went looking for a body.

Rap isn't music. No one has an instrument, no one is singing, there is just some talking. There is no harmony or melody,  there is no real rhythm, there is a loud constant beat that doesn't go anywhere. It is a valid form of expression, it just isn't music.

Offensive Ideas.

This blog is called "The Offender". It has however been pointed out that there has a lack of "offensive" content as of late. This is debatable, as what is offensive varies greatly from person to person. So lets see how offensive we can be, but while also making it funny.

The best reason not to cheat on a woman is it is too much work. One woman takes up enough of your time. You spend a great deal of time with the first woman, talking on the phone, going places, getting meals, seeing films, so forth. Do you really want to double the time you spend doing these things with a second woman? Sure you would get more pussy, but you are doing so much more work for it.

Abortion is always a good option. Childhood is a horrible thing, for both the child, and the people around the child. So do everyone a favor and go for an abortion. Your doing the kid a favor, public school (and private for that matter) is a hell no one needs, and your not going to be a fit parent anyway. Beside think how much money you will save in the long run without having a kid around. Also it is one less child to make noise in restaurants.

Jesus loves porn. I hear his collection is both expansive, and filled with the truly bizarre.

We should really be doing something with dead people. They are dead, but they could still contribute. We could process corpses in to chemicals for farming, or for pharmaceuticals. Or we could raise money by renting corpses out to necrophiliacs. It just seems silly to just bury this potential resource. Also how much money is just left in the ground in the form metals used in fillings and implants, or in false hips. Seems like all of that could be melted down and used again.

So this should cover us on offensive content for a while.

This Really Exists Vol. 1

Sometimes you are dumbfounded to find that something actually exists. You may wonder why it exists, or who it was meant for, but in the end you can think of no answers. One such thing is the commentary tracks that are on pornographic DVDs. Yes, director and actor commentary on pornography. It would seem that it is so hard to understand the actor's motivation, or the effect the director was hoping to attain, that we need to hear what they have to say to clarify what is going on.

His motivation? Could it be banging a hot 20 year old?

These are movies made for people to masturbate too. Is the commentary track there for a fetish of some kind? Is there someone watching that can't get off without hearing the director talking about what went wrong on set? The directors don't have much to say, the commentary track doesn't seem to be their idea. It is great to learn how many takes it took get the money shot just right. Without that information, how could you ever get off?

The actors are far worse than the director. The men don't have much to say, just how many scenes they did that day, or which actresses they enjoy working with. The women on the other hand have lots to say, and none of it is anything you want to hear. The women want to tell the story of how they started doing porn. That story always starts with molestation, and usually incest. Not really things you want to hear when about to rub one out.

Thank you porn industry. Without commentary what would we ever do? How would we ever learn things we don't want to know?

Good things about Christmas.

If you have been reading posts on this blog you have likely caught on to the fact that Christmas is not held in very high esteem around here. Yes, it is true there is a lot to hate about this time of year, but it can't all be bad. While most of it is bad there are a few things that are at least tolerable.

You get free shit. Yeah, it might sound greedy, but the fact is you get gifts. Might not be what you really want, but you can always return it for some cash. The best of gift are things you want to buy yourself but don't have the cash for, a bottle of good liquor, or some high end electronics. At worst you get cash from returning the item, or get a gift card which is like cash only less useful.

 It is alright to get drunk in front of others. People give you a pass around the holidays if you want to have a few too many drinks. People know depression hits hardest around the holidays and will look the other way if you have a gallon of eggnog or vodka. If you are a holiday drunk no one thinks twice, just as long as you don't let on you are drunk during the rest of the year.

Christmas themed porn. It cums way more than once a year.

So remember, it is not all negativity around here.