In defense of ED-209

With the release of the remake of RoboCop talk about the original has come back to an extent. The original RoboCop is a fun, and good movie. However there is one thing in it people like to bash, that being the ED-209.

The ED-209 was a chicken walker mechanoid that didn't function properly. It was in the movie to poke fun at how certain US companies release products. There are many things overtly wrong with the ED-209. It is not programed very well. It seems to lack processing power for its AI. There are clear vulnerabilities in overt places. All of that is true, and more. However, certain things people point at as flaws, are not necessarily flaws.

The one that comes up often is that the ED-209 can't use stairs, that this is a huge design flaw. However, looking at it, it was never meant to go inside buildings or use stairs. The "ED" in ED-209 has two potintial meanings. In the original movie it is said to mean "Enforcement Droid". In the RoboCop live action television series they say "Enforce and Defend". Either way this machine was clearly meant to be on the streets, or to be used at key locations. It was not meant to be a bodyguard for an individual, nor was it ever intended to let loose in an office building. 

Was the ED-209 a poorly built/designed/made machine? Absolutely. However, it is also used improperly when we see it in the original RoboCop movies/television series.

Ideas for a better world.

The world is an increasingly hellish place. There are so many things people could do to make the world just a little better. Some are so small. Even very small things can have huge impacts.

So many screaming children in public, running around, crying, making noise. Why don't we just muzzle the children. Not all of them. Just the ones that can't walk around a store without causing a scene or making an unreasonable amount of noise. Maybe put some electric shock collars on the really bad ones. The collars would not be controlled by the parents, but rather by every other adult in the store.

Remember, it is for the children.

Let people carry a sidearm. The people as a whole would be more polite if a few more guns were around. Sure, we might lose a few people, but not any of the smart ones.

Sitting on your hip. Or maybe a shoulder holster.

We should really stop putting all the dead people in cemeteries. We should be processing the bodies in to something useful. Fertilizer would be easy enough. What about human leather? What pharmaceuticals could be made with the average corpse.

Top 5 reasons I am depressed.

Title says it all.

5. I have no job. I look for work everyday, I apply for work everyday. Still nothing. Fast food won't even hire me.

4. My father is dead. Not only is he dead, but his other two sons are kicking their bullshit into overdrive.

3. Lack of money. This is tied to the lack of employment.

2. A realization that life never really gets any better. Childhood was hell. Adolescence was hell. Adulthood was hell. Guess what middle age is like.

1. A lack of options and hope.

Bukkake (a song parody)

This is set to the tune of "Get Lucky" by Daft Punk. I wish I had the ability to make this more than just lyrics.

It's kind of like a gang bang
Only without the fucking
What keeps the men all stroking (uh)
The face of her is covered

(Look)

We've cum in jars so give up who you are
So let's frost her bod and her hair with our seed

She's up all coated with cum
I'm up all night no lube
She's up with frosted buns
I'm up all night for bukkake

We're up all night 'til we spunk
We're up all night to shoot cum
We're up all night to play with our junk
We're up all night for bukkake

We're up all night for bukkake. (x4)

No condoms and  no ribbing
Our cum will be her frosting,
What is this woman thinking
I'm about to shoot; you ready? (ah)

We've come so much to give up on to her
So let's frost her face and her bod with our spunk

She's up all coated with cum
I'm up all night no lube
She's up with frosted buns
I'm up all night for bukkake

We're up all night 'til we spunk
We're up all night to shoot cum
We're up all night to play with our junk
We're up all night for bukkake

We're up all night for bukkake (x4)

(We're up all night to get) (x4)

(We're up all night to get (together)
We're up all night to get (let's get funked again)
We're up all night to get freaky
We're up all night for bukkake)

(We're up all night for bukkake) (x8)

We've (we're up all night for bukkake)
Come too far (we're up all night for bukkake)
To give up (we're up all night for bukkake)
Who we are (we're up all night for bukkake)
So let's (we're up all night for bukkake)
Raise the bar (we're up all night for bukkake)
And our cups (we're up all night for bukkake)
To the stars (we're up all night for bukkake)

She's up all coated with cum
I'm up all night no lube
She's up with frosted buns
I'm up all night for bukkake

We're up all night 'til we spunk
We're up all night to shoot cum
We're up all night to play with our junk
We're up all night for bukkake

We're up all night for bukkake (x8)

Small update.

My father's death is having more effect on me than I thought. Sorry for a second week of nothing, but right now I have nothing I can give you.

My father is dead.

Sorry, I just have nothing in me to post this week. I don't know if I will have much to say next week either. I need to deal with this, and there is nothing funny about it.

Worst Things in Video Games.

Video games are something of a passion of mine. As an insomniac they have been a very good friend to me over the years. However, there are things that happen in them that get me a bit upset. Some are design choices, some are cliches, some are just trends in the industry.

5. Fanboys. Not unique to video games by any means. Still, they make everything just a little worse.

4. Cliffhanger endings. Don't assume your game is good enough for sequel.

3. Celebrity voice actors. Wow, 3 minutes of dialog from a famed actor, that was so worth the money. Worse when you can see corners were cut other places to pay for it.

2. DLC. The idea is nice. New content, also nice. However, after a few years, you sometimes can't get it anymore. Recently, I got the urge to play some Fallout 3. I reinstall it, patch it, go to get re-download the DLC I paid good money for, and there is no longer a way to download it. Game For Window Live, always looking for new ways to screw over consumers. I miss when you could buy expansion packs on disks.

1. Forced stealth sections in games that aren't designed around stealth. Nothing brings the flow of a game to a halt faster. Your playing, enjoying it, and now here is a part where everything you have learned up to this point is taken away. Stealth only works if the whole game is about it, and the engine the game uses was meant for it.