Everyone out there is making list of hopes for the new year. Seems a little to upbeat. So here are 10 predictions of the worst things that will happen in 2014.
10. Bubonic plague comes back with a vengeance. It becomes air born, and cuts the world population down to only a third of its current size.
9. Canada as a whole catches fire. Canadians everywhere are to polite to say anything about it. French Canada finally successfully seceded in the aftermath.
8. Kim Kardashian commits suicide by an explosive device strapped to her chest. She takes her entire family and Kanye West with her. This is seen as a tragedy by plastic surgeons and their accounts.
7. The end of the human race becomes more likely as sex-bots come on the market. Men everywhere stop giving a shit, and birth rates plummet.
6. The McRib is retired... FOREVER!!!
5. Global warming starts to take hold, only to be halted by the nuclear winter caused by North Korea. It works out for the best, as North Korea only hit themselves when they launched.
4. Justin Bieber found dead from severe rectal trauma in mid August. Alright, most people saw this one coming. Yes, this happened at a brothel.
3. "300: Rise of an Empire" was released to theaters.
2. New Orleans gets flooded again. Seems like we just finished the clean up form the last time too.
1. A zombie plague breaks out in the Vatican in early March. No one can really tell much of a difference. Still, it does stink up the place.
Showing posts with label vatican. Show all posts
Showing posts with label vatican. Show all posts
Saturday, January 4, 2014
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Odd facts.
Just some odd things that happen to be true. Welcoming any thoughts on these subjects.
Men with some form of dwarfism are good people, but men that are just short are always douche bags. Seriously, any dude under about 5'7" (170 cm) is nearly always a douche bag, unless they are suffering from some kind of dwarfism.
The more a man is into a woman, the bigger pain in the ass her friends are going to be. Why do the best women always have such cunt friends? Is this just the universe having fun?
The more attractive a person is (physically speaking) the less they try in every other area. Every bang a "10" that just laid there?
The Vatican is full of men in dresses that also hate gays. Seems like a mixed message to say the least.
Children are god awful. Yes, especially yours.
No one cares about any of your shit.
Men with some form of dwarfism are good people, but men that are just short are always douche bags. Seriously, any dude under about 5'7" (170 cm) is nearly always a douche bag, unless they are suffering from some kind of dwarfism.
The more a man is into a woman, the bigger pain in the ass her friends are going to be. Why do the best women always have such cunt friends? Is this just the universe having fun?
The more attractive a person is (physically speaking) the less they try in every other area. Every bang a "10" that just laid there?
The Vatican is full of men in dresses that also hate gays. Seems like a mixed message to say the least.
Children are god awful. Yes, especially yours.
No one cares about any of your shit.
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