Security Guards.

You seem them everywhere. They are in shopping centers, at banks, and any large public event. They are people with no real power placed to make the dumbest 5% of criminals think twice, and make the most ignorant of consumers feel slightly more safe. They serve no real purpose, and aren't good for much. It is a job with no real point, that is given to people with no real other option.

The people that work as security guards fall into several categories. First there are the ones that think one day they will become police officers, they won't, but it is good they have a dream. Then we have ones that are just not cut out for anything else, too dumb to operate a register, too clumsy to be a stock selves, too ugly to get by on looks. Last we have the failures, ex cons, dishonorably discharged, dirty cops that got caught, and whatever other breed of loser you can imagine. All three of these groups doing what they do because they aren't bright enough for anything else. They are too dumb to see what ISN'T in their future, too dumb to have avoided getting caught at their first choice, or just too dim for most things period.

Security don't really serve much of a purpose. No one serious about committing theft, or any other crime, has ever been scared off by the presence of a security guard. They have no real authority to do anything. Sure they look something like a cop, kinda, if you don't get a very good look at them. In the end they are space fillers, and having them on the payroll is making every item in the store slightly more expensive.

The average security guard is sad, lonely, and likely suicidal person. You don't need to pay them much attention, but don't openly disrespect them. Instead just steal what you want, and give them a smile. We can always be civil.

Losers.

Some people just aren't going to reach sweet success. It could be a lack of drive, or a lack of intelligence, an unfortunate genetic combination, or maybe just bad luck along the way, whatever the case may be some people are just losers. Its alright, there is no shame in it, not everyone can get the best out of life. Of course there are levels of loser. So if you are a loser make the best of it.

Are you an attractive woman with no real skills? Don't have the patience or grace to be a waitress? Why not take up stripping? All you have to do is shake your ass and let strange, lonely, men touch you. You might say it is degrading, but I say it is better than living on the street. You get tips, and with a little luck you can marry an old man and take him for everything he is worth. Keep in mind there is a time limit on how long you can do this ladies.

Now maybe you are a woman not quite attractive enough to take your cloths off for money. That is still no problem. Start a youtube channel where you talk about video games. As long as you are a woman, you will get tons of fanboys watching your videos and clicking your adds. It is a great place for an average looking woman to be treated as queen, despite not having an original thought in her head. You might not be the best looking woman in the world, but you are likely the best looking one that gives a damn about video games.

That is enough about women, lets talk about males losers. Bartender is basically the male version of stripper, as you need not have any real skills to do it, but can make decent cash anyway. You will never need to be awake before 10 am, and you have your choice of women drinking after a breakup to enjoy.  Best part is unlike stripping there is no time limit.

Of course all of these still require a minimal level of motivation. If you really have no drive, you can take up blogging. All you need is an internet connection. Just start one and watch the cash trickle in. You can make up to 20$ a year doing it.

So remember, just because you are a loser doesn't mean there aren't options.