Strippers.

Strippers, those wonderful not quite whores that entertain and empty the pockets of men. They dance, they grind, and usually will have sex for money. They have success as long as there exists a few men that still find them attractive and aren't bothered by the obvious sign of early in life abuse, and the crazy baggage that comes with it all. So here are a few thoughts on strippers.

The best looking strippers are found from 7pm to 2am, on Friday, Saturday, and sometimes Sunday. The further you get from these times the less attractive the women will generally be. On a Tuesday or Wednesday morning you would be lucky to see a woman without a cesarean scar; hell you might see women with fake limps to go along with the fake tits.

You can have some fun with strippers, other than the obvious. Want to clear them out of the club? Just yell "Whoever has the kid locked in the car. They found your stash", they will clear out at speeds you wouldn't believe. Strippers are also a great way to get rid of any counterfeit money you might have come across.

Remember, strippers aren't really in to you. Also, if you have fallen for a stripper, you can do better.